Ya know Vodka is plain and simple a gift from God. If you are a vodka drinker, you know that they can vary in taste. The more expensive = the better tasting vodka……..period.
Vodka goes with almost everything. I recently tried it with Gatorade blue frost…..excellent! You can mix it with any type of juice, hell it probably even goes with milk. I am going to try it in my captain crunch……I already know that it goes with fruit loops.
I hate it when you go into a bar (a place of business that their business is simply liquor) and you ask what their house vodka is and they don’t know. They look at you as if you have asked them what the exact figure of the national debt is or if they know who won last years world series (ha, you don’t remember do you?) More frustrating is when they look at you as if you have asked a ridiculously shtewpid question. They usually walk off shaking their head and mumbling….. f*cking alcoholic, f*cking house vodka……yeah, miss vodka, I’ll make you special drink. Tedi and I went into a bar in Oklahoma City and asked what their house vodka was before ordering our vodka tonics. The waitress's reply was “regular”. Yes they served “regular” vodka at this bar and they apparently also serve unleaded and diesel vodka too. So we ordered us up some “regular” vodka tonics and asked her if she could give us a lube job and check the air in our tires too!
When you ask what the house vodka is, 9 out of 10 times it is McCormick which is essentially butt vodka. I don’t know what the folks at McCormick are doing even attempting to make vodka. They should stick to making parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme. Gawd, that should be the name of a song! If you google how vodka is made you will find that it is made from food items containing starches: sugar beet, molasses, rye, potatoes, wheat and other grains. Smoother vodka is made from grains, such as rye or wheat. Rougher variants are made from potato, molasses or sugar beets.
McCormick must fall under the “rougher” variant of vodka and they must be using rotten potatoes, 100 year old molasses and beets that have been growing in a septic field.
Ok so now you are wondering just what my favorite vodka is………It is without a doubt Ciroc. Ciroc is made from French grapes. Yes FRENCH grapes! Don’t give me any sh*t about France gawd-dammit. I already did my patriotic duty and gave up French fries for a week. I know I dissed on McCormick but I will probably be buying it by the gallon when I am an old decrepit alcoholic and spending my entire social security check on vodka.
Vodka goes with almost everything. I recently tried it with Gatorade blue frost…..excellent! You can mix it with any type of juice, hell it probably even goes with milk. I am going to try it in my captain crunch……I already know that it goes with fruit loops.
I hate it when you go into a bar (a place of business that their business is simply liquor) and you ask what their house vodka is and they don’t know. They look at you as if you have asked them what the exact figure of the national debt is or if they know who won last years world series (ha, you don’t remember do you?) More frustrating is when they look at you as if you have asked a ridiculously shtewpid question. They usually walk off shaking their head and mumbling….. f*cking alcoholic, f*cking house vodka……yeah, miss vodka, I’ll make you special drink. Tedi and I went into a bar in Oklahoma City and asked what their house vodka was before ordering our vodka tonics. The waitress's reply was “regular”. Yes they served “regular” vodka at this bar and they apparently also serve unleaded and diesel vodka too. So we ordered us up some “regular” vodka tonics and asked her if she could give us a lube job and check the air in our tires too!
When you ask what the house vodka is, 9 out of 10 times it is McCormick which is essentially butt vodka. I don’t know what the folks at McCormick are doing even attempting to make vodka. They should stick to making parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme. Gawd, that should be the name of a song! If you google how vodka is made you will find that it is made from food items containing starches: sugar beet, molasses, rye, potatoes, wheat and other grains. Smoother vodka is made from grains, such as rye or wheat. Rougher variants are made from potato, molasses or sugar beets.
McCormick must fall under the “rougher” variant of vodka and they must be using rotten potatoes, 100 year old molasses and beets that have been growing in a septic field.
Ok so now you are wondering just what my favorite vodka is………It is without a doubt Ciroc. Ciroc is made from French grapes. Yes FRENCH grapes! Don’t give me any sh*t about France gawd-dammit. I already did my patriotic duty and gave up French fries for a week. I know I dissed on McCormick but I will probably be buying it by the gallon when I am an old decrepit alcoholic and spending my entire social security check on vodka.
1 comment:
That is SO funny. I can't believe you can say that much about vodka...is that what you and Tedi are...V-O-D-K-A...Voluptuous, Obviously Drugged, Krazy Angels?
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